Posted by seniorgeek | 1 Comment
A Presidental Speech
“Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom, Spain , Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world’s nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.
THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT’ ll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home .
On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bonne chance, mezamies.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don’t care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York
Mexico is also on List 2 its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra thousand tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put ‘em?Yep, border security.
Oh, On another note; In the past 100 yrs, the US government has LOANED billions of dollars to most of the countries on list 2 in time of crisis. Have any of them ever considered paying us back????
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty – starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we’ll be drilling for oil in Alaska- which will take care of this country’s oil needs for decades to come. If you’re an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism.
I answer them by saying, ‘darn tootin.’
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America.
It is time to eliminate homelessness in America.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won’t forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America . Thank you and good night.”
Posted by seniorgeek | 0 Comments
Newsletter 08/31/2008
Back to school is on most people’s minds right now, that is unless you are in to politics then this is the granddaddy of all political times.
Anyway, we have some back to school thoughts and for this week’s issues.
This is for the mom’s and dad’s of grade school children and the children themselves. This area of scholastics.com covers homework for kids and teachers.
It is sorted by subject matter and areas of interest. A very useful and child friendly site.
http://www.scholastic.com/kids/homework/index.htm
If you are going to college the expense can be the worst part of the whole experience for either the student or the parents.
The federal government has a site to help you with applying for funding, loans, etc. It also has some good links to other sites that might help such as student aid.
http://www.fafsa.ed.gov
Continuing on the aid for students them, this site from St. Ambrose College, has a good list of where to apply for grants and student aid.
http://library.sau.edu/bestinfo/Student/aid.htm
The National Center for Education Statistics (NCES), located within the U.S. Department of Education and the Institute of Education Sciences, is the primary federal entity for collecting and analyzing data related to education. Between 1990 and 2005, the enrollment of students under age 25 increased by 32%. Enrollment of persons 25 and over rose by 19% during the same period. From 2005 to 2015, NCES projects a rise of 11% in enrollments of persons under 25, and a rise of 18% in enrollments of persons 25 and over.
http://nces.ed.gov/
The History Channel always amazes me in the programming the produce and varied content that is available. On their web site they have many useful items including the ‘This Day in History’ which is very useful, short and to the point, and great content. Check it out.
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history.do
