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A Presidental Speech
“Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom, Spain , Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world’s nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.
THEN EVERY YEAR THERE AFTER IT’ ll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home .
On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bonne chance, mezamies.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don’t care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York
Mexico is also on List 2 its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra thousand tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put ‘em?Yep, border security.
Oh, On another note; In the past 100 yrs, the US government has LOANED billions of dollars to most of the countries on list 2 in time of crisis. Have any of them ever considered paying us back????
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty – starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we’ll be drilling for oil in Alaska- which will take care of this country’s oil needs for decades to come. If you’re an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism.
I answer them by saying, ‘darn tootin.’
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America.
It is time to eliminate homelessness in America.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won’t forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America . Thank you and good night.”
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Newsletter 08/31/2008
Back to school is on most people’s minds right now, that is unless you are in to politics then this is the granddaddy of all political times.
Anyway, we have some back to school thoughts and for this week’s issues.
This is for the mom’s and dad’s of grade school children and the children themselves. This area of scholastics.com covers homework for kids and teachers.
It is sorted by subject matter and areas of interest. A very useful and child friendly site.
http://www.scholastic.com/kids/homework/index.htm
If you are going to college the expense can be the worst part of the whole experience for either the student or the parents.
The federal government has a site to help you with applying for funding, loans, etc. It also has some good links to other sites that might help such as student aid.
http://www.fafsa.ed.gov
Continuing on the aid for students them, this site from St. Ambrose College, has a good list of where to apply for grants and student aid.
http://library.sau.edu/bestinfo/Student/aid.htm
The National Center for Education Statistics (NCES), located within the U.S. Department of Education and the Institute of Education Sciences, is the primary federal entity for collecting and analyzing data related to education. Between 1990 and 2005, the enrollment of students under age 25 increased by 32%. Enrollment of persons 25 and over rose by 19% during the same period. From 2005 to 2015, NCES projects a rise of 11% in enrollments of persons under 25, and a rise of 18% in enrollments of persons 25 and over.
http://nces.ed.gov/
The History Channel always amazes me in the programming the produce and varied content that is available. On their web site they have many useful items including the ‘This Day in History’ which is very useful, short and to the point, and great content. Check it out.
http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history.do
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Newsletter 08/17/2008
Most of you know that I prefer Yahoo for most of my searches. I get clearer more relevant searches as opposed to Google where you get too many results and too many adds. Therefore I offer the following list off all that Yahoo offers. Check it out you may see something that interests you or a more specialized search to meet your needs. And if you find something interesting to share with your friend, use the Clip add-in to save that link on del.icio.us, Google Bookmarks, etc.
http://everything.yahoo.com/
Do you still subscribe to magazines or do you get all your info from the WWW. How about getting your magazines in digital media so you can link, copy, and search your digital media? This site has a number of magazines available for purchase in digital format.
http://www.zinio.com/home?ns=usa
How about a nice way to tweak Firefox?
The about:config page in Firefox allows you set preferences and tweak certain settings that are otherwise impossible to edit via the regular Firefox Options dialog. For instance, you can alter the default behavior of address bar “Prevent Firefox from Showing Bookmarks in the Address”, set your own domain guessing rules, change user-agent strings, and so much more.
The only problem is that about:config settings are too technical and packed in a geek interface which can be slightly intimidating to most Firefox users. Luckily, there’re some excellent add-ins that add a visual interface (GUI) to about:config settings thus enabling anyone and everyone to “hack” Firefox without being a geek.
“GUI Config” lets you change the default behavior of mouse clicks, browser cache, download window alerts and a dozen other settings. You can hover the mouse over a setting to know in simple English how that change will affect the browser behavior. (Digital Inspiration)
https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/5523/
Do you find that some sites look great in Firefox but not in Internet Explorer? How about the other way around, good in IE and not if FF. I have a solution for you. There is a web browser called “sleipnir” that lets you switch between either browser engine for your surfing. It is the most popular brow2ser in Japan and now available in Japanese translated English. That mean there are a few menus and screen that are not is correct English. Give it a try at:
http://www.fenrir-inc.com/us/sleipnir/
A cool new Firefox add in is called “PDF Download”. It lets you grab any web page and turn it into a PDF. It generates the PDF file while on the page and either emails it to you, or someone else, or saves it to your computer. I find it to be real handy for looking at page that will change and I want to preserve it as it is. One more nice item is that it does NOT save any of the ads on the page.
https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/636
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Newsletter 08/10/2008
Ok, I know I am a slacker, it’s been a while since that last newsletter, but this is the summer season at the beach so, things I had to accomplish are many such as, strolls down the beach, catch some waves with my boogie board, go for some nice motorcycle cruises, and catch up on my summer relaxing. Oh, can’t forget there are many tennis games to play too. Or, the actual reason may be that we purchased a WII. This little white box provides hours of fun. I think I might be addicted to WII Bowling, or WII Tennis, or WII skiing, or WII Table Tennis, or WII….. My current high score in WII Bowling is 258 and I will take on any challengers. <grin>
On TV we here a lot about what the polls say. So, what about the polls? At the following web site is a tutorial that is intended to offer a simplified glimpse into some of the fundamentals of public opinion polling. Designed for the novice, POLLING 101 provides definitions, examples, and explanations that serve to introduce interested people to public opinion research.
http://www.ropercenter.uconn.edu/education/polling_fundamentals.html
Sometimes my short term memory goes, well I don’t know where it goes, it just isn’t there so here’s a tongue in-cheek tribute to anyone who’s ever scribbled a reminder on their hand or wrist. Err, that would be about everybody, right? Check out this to see how you can get help with that short term memory problem. There are other strange items at this site too.
http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=2534
I hope none of you are in the situation where you are falling behind in your mortgage payment do to receiving a sub-prime loan. If you are in need, help may be here shortly. The following is a quote from the web site home page. “The President has signed into law legislation that will allow HUD’s Federal Housing Administration (FHA) to continue providing targeted mortgage assistance to homeowners. The Hope for Homeowners program will continue FHAÂ’s existing and successful efforts to provide aid to struggling families trapped in mortgages they currently cannot afford. Under the program, certain borrowers facing difficulty with their mortgage will be eligible to refinance into FHA-insured mortgages they can afford. The program will be implemented on October 1, 2008.”
http://portal.hud.gov/portal/page?_pageid=73,3947211&_dad=portal&_schema=PORTAL
Since all the above problems my cause something called stress. For some people, it happens before having to speak in public. For other people, it might be before a first date. What causes stress for you may not be stressful for someone else. Sometimes stress is helpful – it can encourage you to meet a deadline or get things done. But long-term stress can increase the risk of diseases like depression, heart disease and a variety of other problems. Therefore you may want to check out the following web page.
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/stress.html
“Topo maps also label structures, buildings, railways, and other features of interest to someone trying to navigate on their own power. All continental areas of the US have been mapped in topographic detail and these crisply printed topo maps are available inexpensively from the United States Geographical Service. The easiest way is to download a free nifty app for Google Earth, called the Topographical Overlay, that will add a KMZ “layer” of official US topo maps on Google Earth. Once installed you can toggle it on or off. When on, the Topo Overlay displays the standard 7.5 minute topos as one seamless map of the country. This makes it very easy to center your interest in the middle of your custom map.” From Cool Tools web site.
http://gearthblog.com/blog/archives/2006/03/best_topo_map_i.html
